My Body, My Rules: Why did I write a picture book about consent?
In our house, we are big fans of cuddles. This being the case, and as mum to exuberantly affectionate kids who’ve been known to tackle friends and strangers with well-intentioned but unwelcome touch, I’ve had many opportunities to discuss the importance of consent at home.
I know from experience it’s not an easy lesson for little kids to learn. It requires patience, on my part and theirs. I repeat myself, incessantly. I wonder why they’re taking so long to get it—why hands aren’t always used kindly, why kisses are foisted on folks who don’t want them. And then I remember they’re still kids. We are working on the rules of consent, and they are learning. And this is ok. We’ve got some time.
I like to think they’ll get it eventually, without even having to be taught. That they’ll grow into the kind of adults who want to treat others with respect. Who organically understand that you only touch another person if that touch is welcome. I like to think these are things that they’ll just know.
But it’s not something I’m willing to leave to chance.
We teach our kids the things we believe are important. The things they need to know, to get along with others, and make their way in the world. Saying please, for example, and saying thank you. Chewing with mouths closed (which seems another tricky one to learn, alas). I don’t want to downplay the importance of these things—I’m a big fan of closed mouthed chewing, truth be told. But it seems to me that the rules of consent are infinitely more important than these other things. So it only makes sense that we teach them, too.
I believe early, age-appropriate education around consent can only help make the world safer for our kids, now and as they grow.
That’s why I wrote this book. It is designed to empower kids as both givers and receivers of touch, teaching them to assert their own boundaries, and respect the boundaries of others. I hope it will be a useful resource for kids and the grownups who love them, in exploring a topic that can sometimes feel kind of tricky to discuss.
Learn more about My Body, My Rules.
